Ainslie Paton romance author

Mum Gets An Urge

Mum:    I bought a breaker.

Me:        You did.  What’s a breaker?

Mum:    Oh, wait, it’s a booster.

Me:        Like kids sit on at the movies?

Mum:    No, for the computer.

Me:        You bought a booster for the computer.   That’s a worry.

Mum:    Why?   They’re supposed to be good for them.

Me:        Are you thinking you need to boost your signal?

Mum:    What does that mean?

Me:        Nevermind.  Your signal to noise ratio is already significant.

Mum:    What do they say about small minds?

Me:        Is this a joke, what do they say?

Mum:    They’re an empty vessel.

Me:        I don’t think that’s what they say.

Mum:    You know what I mean, small minds.

Me:        Are what?

Mum:    Empty as they amuse themselves.

Me:        That’s not a thing.

Mum:    It is when you do it.

Me:        Who told you to get a booster?

Mum:    I learned it somewhere.

Me:        Terrific.  What do you do with this booster?

Mum:    Wish I’d never mentioned it to you.  Why don’t you know this?  It’s on the floor at the moment. I have to plug it in yet.

Me:        Plug it in where?

Mum:    Into the electricity.

Me:        And then what?

Mum:    Nothing apparently.  I just plugged it in.

Me:        What did you think it was going to do?

Mum:    I should’ve known this was a con job.

Me:        You plugged it in like an air freshener?

Mum:    Don’t be daft.

Me:        I don’t understand what the booster is meant to do?

Mum:    Protect me from storms.

Me:        Storms?

Mum:    I probably have to wait till we have one.

Me:        Do you mean a surge protector?

Mum:    I’m looking at the box.  Yes, that’s what it’s called.

Me:        Breaker.  Booster.  Save me.  Have you ever had a power surge?

Mum:    Yes, I have them a lot.

Me:        You do not.

Mum:    I do.  Every time I speak to you I have this powerful surge to throttle you.


Hello, what are you thinking?

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