Ainslie Paton romance author

The Drunk’s Monologue

Overheard: The drunk’s monologue

This happened on the Street in Fremantle, Perth.

The players:  Me, a couple walking in front of me, various shopkeepers.  It’s raining.

The drunk walks behind us.  He says:

I’m hungry.  I’m so hungry.  Why won’t anyone give me money?  Why won’t anyone feed me?  I’m a good bloke.  I’m so hungry.  You buggers should feed me.  I haven’t eaten since (long pause, during which I wonder if he is still behind me) breakfast.  (He laughs. Man in front of me barks out a laugh too).

I’m hungry.  Hear that, my stomach growled.  I’m so hungry and none of you buggers will feed me.  I could die of hunger.  I could.  I’m so hungry.  You should give me money, but you don’t care.  You should care.  I’m a good bloke.  I could be black.  (He’s not.  Long pause during which the couple in front turn to look at him.  Then in a high, tight and surprised voice the drunk says) Where did that come from?


Hello, what are you thinking?

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