A Conversation with Mum about when pie isn’t pie

The set up:  I had a super bad headache that lasted for days.  Mum and Dad show up.  They bring an African Violet and rhubarb pie.  Go parents.

The next day:  Mum calls.

Mum:    How is the head?

Me:        Just have the headache hangover, feeling much better.  It was nice getting pie yesterday.

Mum:    Where did you get pie?

Me:        What do you mean?

Mum:    How did you get pie?

Me:        That would be the same answer.

Mum:    I don’t know the answer.

Me:        You brought me pie.

Mum:    No. You did look terrible though. Your eyes were all funny.  You’re making it up.

Me:        What?

Mum:    You must’ve dreamed it.

Me:        You and dad came here yesterday with—

Mum:    An African violet.  It’s not dead already is it?

Me:        No, it’s not dead.  You ate the pie.

Mum:    I didn’t eat any pie.

Me:        Am I losing it or are you? You picked all the rhubarb out and left the crust. That’s still eating the pie.

Mum:    Oh, rhubarb pie.  Thought you meant pie.

Me:        How is rhubarb pie not pie?

Mum:    It’s not hot.

Me:        Well it could be.

Mum:    I always think meat when I think pie. I never think rhubarb pie.

Me:        Except you call it pie.

Mom:     What else would I call it?

Me:         I have a headache.